Giving Thanks

No one challenged me to come up with things to be thankful for, and for that, I thank my friends. The church says that one can always find things to be thankful for, and I try to live up to that challenge of looking for the silver lining, even when things look bleak. I often times will consider my life and the loved ones, family and friends that make up my network and marvel at the amazing people in my life. They are a gifted bunch with so many different attributes that I feel very lucky to call them friends.

This week, I felt blue. I really couldn't put my finger on why, but my emotions were feeling vulnerable and I was easily upset. I casted about, trying to figure out what was going on, since I pride myself on being in control on the outside even when my insides are heaving with sentiment. It goes back to my training with a national consumer products company; first as a travelling sales rep, a corporate recruiter, west coast district manager and lastly as the director of a division at a very young 27 years of age. I learned a lot about having the guts and grim determination to succeed. I certainly didn't want my bosses to see me cry in frustration.

My kids are away at college. Yes, those bright spots in my life that make me who I am today. They could be part of the reason I'm a bit more emotional these days.  I am so proud of them, each following their own paths towards careers and learning to be independent adults. But wow, I miss them. I miss their daily ins and outs around the house. I miss their voices. I don't really miss their messy rooms, but I miss cooking for them and doing the things I have been doing for the last 20 years. As they make their way through higher education, living within a greek organization and figuring out what they want to do with their lives, it makes me feel like I did something right when they want to talk to me about how it's going. They will tell you I'm a softie and cry all the time, because when it comes to cheering their successes, lamenting over the disappointments and hurts and having to say goodbye as they drive away, those tears are always right there.

So why so blue? I'm not sure, but I reached out to my friends and was overwhelmed by the response. Between a lunch with an old friend, trivia with the girls and a few other interactions throughout the week, as I sat here and took an assessment of my life, I realized that I am a lucky lady. I'm blessed, and so undeserving of the many gifts of friendship I have been given. And for that I am eternally grateful to so many that lift me up, make me smile and laugh. The give and take of friendship is truly a gift and I will take that any day.